When Women Abuse Their Unearned Power

A True Story

By

James Pew

I am the first to admit that I am far from perfect. I have many flaws. Some, I’m fully aware of but stubbornly don’t do anything to fix. I live with them instead, and try to manage them so they don’t take over and turn me into a monster. I guess you could even say I have demons. However, this entire matter is something I spend no time on. Why bother? It’s not to say I’ve never addressed one of my character flaws or matured. On the contrary, when I am determined to change something I no longer like or find useful about myself, I do it. It’s not that hard. However, without the determination to do so, I don’t do it. I live with it instead. I manage it.

There is a side of me - the good side - that is far more likeable, funny, disciplined, determined, and perhaps most deliberately, principled. This is the side I’d prefer people to focus on. It’s the side I focus on. That other guy - the James that occupies the dark side - can be a bit of a dick sometimes. He can be aggressive, perhaps overly forceful, impatient, sarcastic, humorless, and  a bore. I am not proud of him, but even he is not unprincipled, he’s not a thief or a plagiarizer.

Technically speaking, I’m not proud of the good James either. Pride is a sin. I believe there is nothing one should be proud of. However, if I had to compare good side James with bad side James, and choose only one to represent me, obviously I’m going with good James. I like good James. Thankfully, lots of people like good James. And the thing I like the most about him/me is the strict adherence to moral principles. In this domain, my record is as flawless and as close to perfection as any imperfect human can hope to achieve. 

That is why when Melanie Bennet sent an email to one of my publishers accusing me of plagiarizing her work - an act that resulted in the destruction of a great opportunity of mine (more on that below) - I decided I was not going to sit by idly while a woman, who has no sense of boundaries, and who was simply upset that she was told “no” by me (more on that below), and who knows full well the power she has to damage a man's reputation, was permitted to destroy things that are important to me, that I have worked incredibly hard for, and above all, that I deserved, and had earned through great effort and sacrifice.

When Melanie approached me asking if I would be interested in co-writing something with her, her only concern was that the work find the largest audience possible. As far as I know, Melanie is an unknown unpublished author. I have been at this for just over three years and have published quite a bit, I’ve also published over 500 articles on Woke Watch Canada during that time (a big chunk of which I wrote). It made sense that Melanie would want to leave the publishing part up to me. It was understood by both of us that I would be dealing with one of my past publishers when it came to the piece we ended up writing. Melanie had no stipulations, no concerns, no items needing to be addressed. She claimed she just wanted the piece published.

The first part of our co-writing project went smoothly. We came up with a piece that I felt was strong. I told Melanie I was going to submit the piece. She agreed. I submitted the piece. The publisher wanted some changes and revisions. They liked the piece but wanted it to be adapted to suit their readership. A totally reasonable request. Not out of the ordinary at all. I had worked with this particular editor before and I loved the way that article had developed. Great editors do not get enough credit!

The problem with Melanie began during the revision process. She started reacting emotionally to things I wrote that I had added to the piece. At one point she apologized for her snappy attitude. At this point I knew I had made a mistake. This was not at all like any of the other many writing collaborations I’ve successfully been involved in. 

After the emotional outburst and subsequent apology, Melanie asked that she be given the contact info of my publisher so she could deal with them directly. What!? Already annoyed by her behaviour, and shocked by her nerve, I told her no, that was not going to happen, that I have a business relationship with this publisher I intend to manage and protect like all good business people do. However, the straw that broke the camel's back was when Melanie edited out big chunks of my contribution, and then insisted her name be listed first on the author's byline. I was given an ultimatum, list her name first, or she won’t permit it to be published.

At this point she told me her only concern was getting credit for her work. Her concerns of course had evolved during the process. When we began the only concern was getting the piece published. There was no mention of credit, there was no insistence on top billing on the byline.  But, most importantly, there was never any chance she was not going to be fully credited as an equal co-writer with me.

The publisher had previously contacted me, and commissioned me to write several pieces. Melanie knew this. She also knew this was a paid gig, and that I was generously splitting the payment with her 50/50. Melanie knew, because I explained it to her, that this publisher had commissioned me, not her, for the piece. Melanie continued with her ultimatum. I was disgusted by the pettiness and narcissism of it all. I told Melanie, it wasn’t going to happen. She did not have any conditions or concerns going into the partnership, so it was unprincipled to start making demands, giving ultimatums, and stating conditions after the revision process with the publisher had already begun. I would never have submitted a piece with Melanie as a co-writer, if I had known she would do that. And further, I would never submit a piece that a publisher commissioned me to write, with my name listed second in the byline after a co-writer (especially an unknown, unpublished co-writer). Who would do that?

To be clear, the byline of the piece was to appear like so: Written by James Pew & Melanie Bennet. This byline format makes us both equal co-writers. However, this was not the narcissistic supply Melanie was looking for. Disgusted by her behaviour, I decided to pull the piece from the publisher. I told Melanie this is what I was going to do. She wouldn’t budge. So I pulled the piece. I told the publisher I still wanted to rework it and bring it more in line with the expectations of the readership. I reworked the piece. I deleted all of Melanie's research and writing (which was slightly more than 50% of the piece), and added new research and some new interview content, to the stuff I had previously written. The new piece was far better than what was originally submitted.

When I re-submitted the piece to the publisher, not wanting to damage Melanie’s reputation, I very tactfully explained that the piece no longer involved her. I told them that her contribution was too theoretical and not well-suited for the publisher's readers. I was not wrong in this assessment. Melanie’s work is too theoretical for this particular publisher, and the new piece I submitted was indeed better suited for the target readership. Maybe all of the aggravation was somehow worth it, or at least part of the process needed to arrive at a great piece.

But here is where things get unbelievable. Before I was able to move on from the aggravation and de-Melanie the piece in order to resubmit a better solo written piece, Melanie went behind my back and emailed my contact at the publisher with concerns that I was stealing her work. 

There are many things that are outrageous about what Melanie did. I don’t need to spoon feed the reader, I’m sure you all get it. But what really angers me, is that this work that Melanie was claiming I was stealing from her, was for the most part research done by Mr. M, that he had shared with the Lighthouse Think Tank research group. This is a research group that I started. Mr. M is the lead researcher. He is a prolific genius who deserves a ton of credit. My article, the one sans Melanie, gave credit to Mr. M for his research. On the other hand, Melanie appears to be passing off, at least in part, Mr. M’s research as her own. I did not invite her into the group to share our research, for her to then claim ownership of it (something not even Mr. M does) and accuse others of plagiarizing it. I know she does some of her own research too, so I don’t mean to imply she is only plagiarizing Mr. M. I know that at least some of her research comes from Mr. M, but other than that, I don’t really know what she is doing, and I don’t care. I care only about my reputation. Melanie has damaged it, and I see no way to restore it. This article is all I have.

So how did Melanie get into the Lighthouse Think Tank and at Mr. M’s research? I invited her into the group so she would have access to the research to better inform her You Tube videos (she does You Tube video analysis of critical theory etc., that is why I was interested in working with her). Either way, she was convinced that I had stolen her research and plagiarized her work. She contacted my publisher and told them this. None of it is true. Melanie had not even seen the piece I submitted, how would she know if I had plagiarized anything? Why wouldn’t she ask me first to see the piece before going behind my back and making us both look like unprofessional fools?

When the publisher told me that Melanie emailed them, they wanted to know what was going on. I told them I was surprised Melanie had done that. And that her concerns were unwarranted. I was not in any way stealing her work. I told them I would send my new piece to Melanie so she can see for herself that all of her writing and research was removed. That seemed to alleviate their concerns. I sent the piece to Melanie. I also asked Mr. M to mediate. He went through my entire piece with Melanie line by line. Melanie admitted to Mr. M that in fact, James had not stolen her work.

However, the damage has already been done. The publisher no longer wants anything to do with me. Can you blame them? They had previously commissioned me to write the piece I submitted and several others. Amazingly, these were paid opportunities to write the type of stuff I write, and have it published to a national audience - these opportunities are few and far between. I am hurt financially because of this. My reputation is also damaged - which has an inestimable financial cost as well. I am a struggling single father, and small business owner. Researching, writing, and running Woke Watch Canada, has involved enormous sacrifices. It is sometimes difficult to determine if I am making a huge mistake by spending so much time on it. 

I thought about asking Melanie to email my publisher again, this time explaining how she was wrong to contact them in the way she did, and wrong to accuse me of plagiarism. But like I said, the damage is done. Nothing can undo it. At this point any more communication with my former publisher on this matter from Melanie or me will most likely be viewed as an annoyance and make matters worse. As if they could be worse.

The whole experience can be summed up in an ambiguous X post that is totally referring to Melanie, that I posted this morning:

“A woman sent an email with an untruth about me, and was able to have a hard earned and well-deserved opportunity destroyed for me. It took her no effort, she was immediately believed, I was immediately cancelled. I am just a man - a struggling single father to boot! No one gives a fuck!”

And then, to be as clear as day, I reposted the above, adding the following:

“This woman has hurt my family and I. Why? Because I told her ‘no’.”

Lastly, and this part hurts man. The entire reason this particular publisher had initially contacted me asking me to write for them, was because a person, an accomplished person of stature that I admire greatly, went out on a limb and vouched for me. Through the kindness of his heart he recommended me. And I’ve utterly blown it by involving an unhinged unprofessional narcissist. That will be hard to live down.

But you wanna know something readers? I have had setbacks before. I have been disappointed before. None of what I have been through up until this point has slowed me down. Not one bit. This is frustrating. But if anything, it has made me even more focused and energized and determined to research, write, and publish all the things that need so desperately to be said. 

As well, I am not going to stop collaborating with others. Although I will exercise more caution when doing so with people I don’t know. But more importantly I am not going to stop writing and fighting for what I believe in! I will continue building a solid readership here, and I will continue seeking opportunities to publish in other places. I will win.

To everyone on my side who supports me. Thank you. You are brilliant. You have amazing taste. You know talent, determination, and pure badass when you see it! 

To those who don’t support me or don’t want to work with me: your loss.

To the principled truth-seekers who share some of the anti-woke values written about in these pages by myself and others, please do consider lending your financial support to Woke Watch Canada. The effort and sacrifice involved in running this newsletter, and researching/writing on the topics I do,  cannot be overstated. Donations and paid subscriptions are greatly needed and appreciated!! 

And of course, if you are a publisher, or if you know a publisher, and you like the type of stuff I write: hook a brother up (I promise no narcissists).

Thank you for coming to my rant talk - I was super pissed when I started writing this, it came out in a fast and fluid furry, and I feel slightly better now. Although the part about the person who recommended me still stings (I can’t stand letting people down). As a white man - often considered the lowest scum on the totem pole - it can be emasculating and leave one feeling powerless when faced with the type of scenario I was faced with. Women should not simply be able to destroy men with a few keystrokes. In truth, I’m far from destroyed, but the relationship with the publisher is. However, it turns out, regardless of my lowly white man status, I am actually not powerless. I have words and a popular newsletter with thousands of subscribers, and a solid inner circle of hardcore supporters - In many ways, I have it made. I’m far from powerless. On the contrary, I am a force of nature that I dare anyone to reckon with.

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Thanks for reading. For more from this author, read When the Abused Becomes the Abuser

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